Problem with Perfectionism: To "C' or Not to "C" (That is the question)


Take an emotionally sensitive woman with Borderline Personality Disorder traits (and in recovery from BPD), a perfectionist complex, and two intensive semester courses jammed into four weeks and what do you get?  This video.

I hope it speaks to you, encourages you, or helps you in some way.  I look forward to your thoughts.

I also get into the reality of being in recovery of BPD and how it is simply not a straight, easy road -- and why that is okay, too.




If you are unable to see this video on your device, click here to watch it on YouTube.


Thanks for reading and watching.
More soon.

10 comments:

  1. I really identified with this post because I've had a lot of issues with perfectionism. I've been practicing not being so hard on myself and not pushing myself so much - trusting myself to do what needs to be done without the constant pressure. But, unlike we're wont to do, we can't go to the other extreme and be indifferent of quality - especially if we have a professional job.
    It get's tiring walking all these tight-ropes doesn't it! :S ;)

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    1. Hi Bill. Thank you so much for your comment and for sharing. I am trying to learn to live in more "ease" so as to not feel the pressure of the tightropes that you mention and that I am familiar with. Hope you are well! ♥

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  2. I really appreciated this video. I like the unedited format, b/c I felt like I was getting to know your personality a little bit instead of hearing a rehearsed storyline. I have the same issues with perfectionism. I have 2 B.S degrees with a 4.0. I regret having pushed myself so hard for those years and looking back I see the unnecessary stress and all I missed out on in my relationships by working so hard. The benefits of the GPA are very minimal, and now that I'm in the workforce nobody knows my grades anyway! I think you are making the right decision to take this middle path. Finishing your Masters will be such a great achievement and something to be proud of.

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    1. Thank you so much for commenting, K. Firstly, I appreciate your feedback on the unedited vlog video. I also appreciate that you were willing to share your experience as well. WOW. You had some powerful insights after completing your programs. I decided to dig deeper and gain some insight as to whether these programs are right for me right now, given the course load and content that I have found very difficult as an emotionally sensitive person who also has PTSD. I have actually decided to withdraw from the time being an am practicing acceptance around this. Thank you again! ♥

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  3. Hi Debbie!
    I thought I would respond to the video as this subject is something that I have had to deal with recently, too. I was an undergraduate student trying to do my BA in Fine Art. At the beginning of the year my mental health really took hold of me, and I was unable to go to my lectures, and make it into uni, even though I only had to be in for 2 days a week. I was asked part way through to consider taking some time out of studying, but I decided that I didn't want to do that as it would mean that I wouldn't graduate until 2015, and I would also not be in a group where I had formed friendships and would have to go through that again. I decided to carry on, but again my mental health kept on declining and eventually I had to make the decision to take time out.
    My lecturers did infact try to convince me to carry on with the rest of the semester and just scrape a pass through into my final year, but I knew I wouldn't be happy with that, even if the grades didn't count towards my final degree.
    I do sometimes get annoyed at myself for not completing the year, but I know that it was what was needed to try and get myself back on track, and hopefully enable me to carry on with my course in January.
    Thank you for sharing your experience, and also I found it really great that you said about how long it too you to complete your undergraduate studies, as I know that if time out is what it takes for me to get there, I will still get there in the end (although I do have to complete mine within 6 years as uni policy states!)
    It's great that you made the decision to do what is right for your mental health and I wish you the best of luck.
    Oh, and I'm sorry that this turned into a mini story, it really wasn't meant to be this long. I just ramble a lot, as I am doing now infact ;)
    Thanks for the video! ♥

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    1. Hello Naomi,

      Thank you for taking the time to leave such a kind comment and for sharing some of your story and experience as well. Huge hugs! ♥

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  4. Debbie - I loved this post. And you know what crossed my mind, any emotionally sensitive person might have this problem - not just someone in remission from BPD. Be kind to yourself, you've done so well and helped so many people! xxx

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    1. Hi Kate -- thank you for your kind comment -- and you are right! Many emotionally sensitive people encounter this type of thinking as well. Thank you for your kindness. ♥

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  5. It won't let me watch the video. I tried on two different computers, it says it's a private video.

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    1. Hi Babette. Thank you for bringing this to my attention. It's now fixed!♥

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