How An Episode of Ally McBeal Woke Me Up Tonight
I was just so deeply, emotionally moved and brought to tears that I had to start writing while the experience was still fresh. We all know that television shows are works of fiction, but most of us also know that if you bring together some magic ingredients like great acting, characters you love, and dramatic moments that all of humanity can relate to, the recipe is ripe for an emotional experience. This is what happened for me tonight.
- You never know the cause of someone’s behavior. Judgments without all of the facts are just opinions and interpretations, and we can often be wrong. It’s better to be openhearted, loving, and caring with all people. (Of course you don’t stick around for abuse — you take care of yourself and stand up for yourself, but in the case when you can opt for kindness while still being in integrity with yourself and staying safe — well, for me, it’s what I want to do.)
- We never know how long we have with the people in our lives. Things can suddenly happen and they can be whisked away to the after world without warning. I want to not take people for granted. I want to treat those I love with the same love and compassion today that I would wish I had treated them with if they were suddenly gone. Let’s not wait until it’s too late to genuinely love those around us.
- (TW) Borderline Personality Disorder can sometimes get us caught up in some selfish thoughts. There is cause for why we can get so wrapped up in our own drama and get depressed and even feel suicidal. Think about someone you love dearly and how you would feel if they were gone. Know that, believe it or not, if you were to take your life, you would have that impact on them. It’s a pain that people never truly get over. If you are depressed to the point where you want to hurt yourself and you can’t even think about your own well-being, I urge you to reach out and get help anyway. Think of your loved ones and the impact on them.
- I am going in for an EEG and an MRI later this month to be sure I do not have a brain tumor or that I didn’t have a stroke. I’ve been having some symptoms, and though my neurologist says that he thinks I am fine based on some tests he did, he is having me undergo the exams to put mine and my psychiatrist’s minds at ease. The topic of the episode and how quickly the character died obviously hit close to home since I am going through this scare right now. I thought I wanted to keep low key about it, but the truth is, as much as I believe I will be okay, there is a part of me that worries and is afraid. This show really got me thinking about the importance of taking care of ourselves, following through with appointments, and being open to life. I will accept the best possible care that is out there to be sure I am okay.
- As much as painful emotional experiences may be uncomfortable, I find that they also hold within them powerful lessons. I seem to learn the most when I can get in touch with feelings like the ones evoked within me tonight.
It sounds like you experienced some really powerful emotions tonight. You have written about them so well! I have been thinking a lot about my family lately – as currently I'm living with my parents, and we are all growing much closer. Losing one of them is something too painful to even think of. I will really draw on this emotional lesson the next time I am feeling suicidal ideation. xoxox
It sounds like you experienced some really powerful emotions tonight. You have written about them so well! I have been thinking a lot about my family lately – as currently I'm living with my parents, and we are all growing much closer. Losing one of them is something too painful to even think of. I will really draw on this emotional lesson the next time I am feeling suicidal ideation. xoxox