Boundary Bubble for the Emotionally Sensitive Person
Learn more about boundaries and relationships as an emotionally sensitive person in this online Interpersonal Effectiveness DBT class.
Learn more about boundaries and relationships as an emotionally sensitive person in this online Interpersonal Effectiveness DBT class.
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Thanks, as always, for writing this post. 🙂 I struggle with this as well. Especially over the past week, as I've been feeling much more grounded, skillful, and what? Can it be? Happy? Yes, even, happy at times, I'll read a tweet or post about someone else's distress and suddenly feel like I should be doing more to be a support to others and then I even start to feel guilty about my positive emotions. Feeling like I don't have the right to feel good until everyone gets a break. Those are times when I need to recognize that I deserve to feel good when I am, and that if I need to set up some boundaries for my own emotional regulation, that is OK.
On a related note: your boundary bubble exercise… Back when my BPD and C-PTSD symptoms came back full-force this past spring, like rocking all 9 critera after being down to 3-4 for about two years, I was having major trouble with sleep. This was also before I went back on meds, one of which helps with sleep. Well, anyway, one night Rowan walked me through guided imagery of me creating a spherical wall around me to keep my worries, urges, and distressing thoughts at bay so I could sleep. It worked like a charm! I was sleeping like 3 minutes later. So, all that said, I highly recommend the boundary bubble exercise for sleep as well. 🙂
Thanks, as always, for writing this post. 🙂 I struggle with this as well. Especially over the past week, as I've been feeling much more grounded, skillful, and what? Can it be? Happy? Yes, even, happy at times, I'll read a tweet or post about someone else's distress and suddenly feel like I should be doing more to be a support to others and then I even start to feel guilty about my positive emotions. Feeling like I don't have the right to feel good until everyone gets a break. Those are times when I need to recognize that I deserve to feel good when I am, and that if I need to set up some boundaries for my own emotional regulation, that is OK.
On a related note: your boundary bubble exercise… Back when my BPD and C-PTSD symptoms came back full-force this past spring, like rocking all 9 critera after being down to 3-4 for about two years, I was having major trouble with sleep. This was also before I went back on meds, one of which helps with sleep. Well, anyway, one night Rowan walked me through guided imagery of me creating a spherical wall around me to keep my worries, urges, and distressing thoughts at bay so I could sleep. It worked like a charm! I was sleeping like 3 minutes later. So, all that said, I highly recommend the boundary bubble exercise for sleep as well. 🙂
Hello Aeshe,
Thank you for your comment. I am ecstatic that you are feeling HAPPY! "Feeling like I don't have the right to feel good until everyone gets a break" is something I struggle with often, too. I think it shows incredible compassion, but we know, deep down, that we cannot serve others or be there for them if we don't first take care to guard our own hearts and minds and take care of ourselves.
That's so cool about the boundary bubble's existence in your life! ♥ Debbie
Hello Aeshe,
Thank you for your comment. I am ecstatic that you are feeling HAPPY! "Feeling like I don't have the right to feel good until everyone gets a break" is something I struggle with often, too. I think it shows incredible compassion, but we know, deep down, that we cannot serve others or be there for them if we don't first take care to guard our own hearts and minds and take care of ourselves.
That's so cool about the boundary bubble's existence in your life! ♥ Debbie
I used to visit an old age home. Last year one of such visit triggered a long depression phase. I thought of plight of old people and got depressed. I also started thinking what if I was in place of them. I felt helpless and scared not only for them but also for myself and lost almost two months of my life on bed… with an emptiness all around.
This bubble technique seems really great.
I used to visit an old age home. Last year one of such visit triggered a long depression phase. I thought of plight of old people and got depressed. I also started thinking what if I was in place of them. I felt helpless and scared not only for them but also for myself and lost almost two months of my life on bed… with an emptiness all around.
This bubble technique seems really great.
Hi Jeevs,
How nice of you to do this with your time, and I'm so sorry that you were triggered in the process. I am so glad that you might use the bubble technique to help you.
We tend to be VERY compassionate people, but as the Buddha said, if you compassion doesn't include yourself, it is incomplete. We must protect our hearts, too.
♥ Debbie
Hi Jeevs,
How nice of you to do this with your time, and I'm so sorry that you were triggered in the process. I am so glad that you might use the bubble technique to help you.
We tend to be VERY compassionate people, but as the Buddha said, if you compassion doesn't include yourself, it is incomplete. We must protect our hearts, too.
♥ Debbie
Thank you for this! You too, huh? I take in feral cats, feral men that are homeless, women as well. (learned a BIG lesson on that one). My heart actually aches for these people and animals….I've been putting my bubble around me quite a bit lately and it feels really safe and good, the luminescence of the bubble around me, like a rainbow. I do that, and also I imagine white light coming out the top of my head and surrounding my body. For my pain, physical, I do alot of visualization and biofeedback, meditation/mindfulness songs or pan flute. Thank you for this article. Somebody is kinda just like me, now I don't feel so bad about it. We are DEEP. 😉
And that's a good thing…embrace it instead of fighting it. ya know.
Thank you for this! You too, huh? I take in feral cats, feral men that are homeless, women as well. (learned a BIG lesson on that one). My heart actually aches for these people and animals….I've been putting my bubble around me quite a bit lately and it feels really safe and good, the luminescence of the bubble around me, like a rainbow. I do that, and also I imagine white light coming out the top of my head and surrounding my body. For my pain, physical, I do alot of visualization and biofeedback, meditation/mindfulness songs or pan flute. Thank you for this article. Somebody is kinda just like me, now I don't feel so bad about it. We are DEEP. 😉
And that's a good thing…embrace it instead of fighting it. ya know.
You are too funny Lori! 🙂 Thank you also for sharing your method for visualization and for acknowledging that we are good and kind people, and we must also take care of ourselves!
You are too funny Lori! 🙂 Thank you also for sharing your method for visualization and for acknowledging that we are good and kind people, and we must also take care of ourselves!