Resources: Men and Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD)

I already know about the difficulties of experiencing the symptoms of Borderline Personality Disorder as a woman.  I can only imagine how difficult it must be to be a man with BPD in a culture that undervalues emotional expression from males and often encourages the expression of stereotypical anger, macho-ism, and the suppression of emotions such as sadness and vulnerability.

When we hear about men with regards to Borderline Personality Disorder,  we often hear from husbands, partners, and fathers of woman who suffer from BPD.  It is not too often that we come across men who are talking about their own personal experience of suffering from the disorder.  But that is, thankfully, slowly starting to change.

More and more men are beginning to feel safe coming forward with their own personal struggles with the oppressive symptoms of BPD and are seeking the services that can help in the management of their intense emotions.
There are two men in particular who I credit with helping to pave the way for other courageous men to step up and receive the help that they deeply need and desperately deserve: NFL player Brandon Marshall (Project Borderline) and artist Ben Moroski (This Vicious Minute).

Watch pieces of their stories, here:

TRIGGER WARNING – Contains potentially triggering content.

“This Vicious Minute” by Ben Moroski:


NFL’s Brandon Marshall’s documentary trailer for “The Borderline Monster:”

END TRIGGER WARNING 

As part of my own effort to help bring change to this area I, with therapist Alicia Paz, M.A., LLPC have banded together to offer a DBT Distress Tolerance class exclusively to men via a 100% online format that allows for a supportive, private, encouraging environment. And, you do not need to have BPD or any other diagnosis to attend.

This class was born out of an identified need for a safe, caring place for men who wish to work on emotion regulations issues such as anger, anxiety, or struggling with intense emotions.

If you are a male looking to sign up for this course, you can find out more information on the DBT Path Class page.

For more intensive services, if you are man between the ages of 17-28, the Roanne Program in Southern California offers in-person services to help you overcome emotion regulation issues.

Are you or do you know a man who has BPD or other issues around emotion regulation?  What have been the biggest challenges to seeking and receiving the support and care you need to work through these issues to recovery and healing?

Also, are you (or do you know) a man who has BPD or other emotion regulation issues who has an established blog or vlog who might be interested in auditing a class at DBT Path for review purposes? Contact dbtpath[at]gmail[.]com if so.

More soon,
Debbie


Other Resources:

Article by Dr. Robert Fischer of Optimum Performance Institute, “BPD and Males: Finally We Are Addressing It.

Article by Richard Zwolinksi, LMHC, CASAC & C.R. Zwolinski of Therapy Soup at PsychCentral, an interview with Dr. Fischer on “Men Can Have Borderline Personality Disorder, Too.”

David O’Garr’s personal story of “Life As a Man with BPD.” 

Online DBT classes for men and women at DBT Path.

Know of other resources for men with BPD that should be included in this article? Tweet them to @HealingFromBPD or comment below or at our Facebook Page.

11 replies
  1. Caroline DowntheCenter
    Caroline DowntheCenter says:

    The very first person I met who was open about a diagnosis of BPD was a man. Not only had I never met anyone with BPD before, I had never even heard of the diagnosis. While he clearly had suffered, what I remember most is just that he was a really intelligent, articulate, cool guy. It only was later that I learned that the chances of having such a first encounter is slim. Still, it was a hugely formative experience for me.

    I sincerely hope to see more men join the BPD community. The entire community will be richer for it.

    Reply
  2. Caroline DowntheCenter
    Caroline DowntheCenter says:

    The very first person I met who was open about a diagnosis of BPD was a man. Not only had I never met anyone with BPD before, I had never even heard of the diagnosis. While he clearly had suffered, what I remember most is just that he was a really intelligent, articulate, cool guy. It only was later that I learned that the chances of having such a first encounter is slim. Still, it was a hugely formative experience for me.

    I sincerely hope to see more men join the BPD community. The entire community will be richer for it.

    Reply
  3. Jeevs
    Jeevs says:

    Hi Debbie
    I am a man from india diagnosed with BPD. Yours is one of the first blog I read online. Your blogs n tweets have given me hope. I am really looking forward to live a decent life. And also inspire others, just like you.

    Reply
  4. Mark Ciesniewski
    Mark Ciesniewski says:

    Hi, this is an interesting read for me. I am currently in hospital (in Australia) after a 'soft' attempt at suicide. I wrote a note and took non-lethal overdose. I have been in hospital 5 days. It is a slow process. I have been given the diagnosis on Bi-Polar but I am not convinced (I am about to change meds). Perhaps only partially true? The label (which is obviously not as important as the solution) I most relate to is Borderline Personality Disorder. After seeing a Psych for about 8 months with not much progress he started to change his focus from CBT to personality. I was given two extensive questionnaires that form part of Schema Therapy. I broke down in tears after completing both. I am supposed to see him in a few weeks but am not sure I can afford to see him. I also wonder whether DBT might be a better treatment option over schema therapy? I cannot see a future at the moment but keep staying alive with the dream of somehow recovering and having a better future. I pray. I wait. I have created a mess of a life with failed after failed friendships and relationships, moving from house to house, job to job, huge gambling problems leading to financial ruin. Writing this relieves some of the distress.

    Reply
  5. Mark Ciesniewski
    Mark Ciesniewski says:

    Hi, this is an interesting read for me. I am currently in hospital (in Australia) after a 'soft' attempt at suicide. I wrote a note and took non-lethal overdose. I have been in hospital 5 days. It is a slow process. I have been given the diagnosis on Bi-Polar but I am not convinced (I am about to change meds). Perhaps only partially true? The label (which is obviously not as important as the solution) I most relate to is Borderline Personality Disorder. After seeing a Psych for about 8 months with not much progress he started to change his focus from CBT to personality. I was given two extensive questionnaires that form part of Schema Therapy. I broke down in tears after completing both. I am supposed to see him in a few weeks but am not sure I can afford to see him. I also wonder whether DBT might be a better treatment option over schema therapy? I cannot see a future at the moment but keep staying alive with the dream of somehow recovering and having a better future. I pray. I wait. I have created a mess of a life with failed after failed friendships and relationships, moving from house to house, job to job, huge gambling problems leading to financial ruin. Writing this relieves some of the distress.

    Reply
  6. Debbie Corso
    Debbie Corso says:

    TW TW for Mark's post and my comment….

    Dear Mark,

    Very sorry to hear you've been in so much pain, and glad to hear you are safe. Please continue to reach out to professionals when feeling the way you did recently.

    Please continue to hold on to your hope. People can and do get better from emotion regulation disorders. DBT is what helped me overcome. I now co-facilitate online DBT classes (and we have some students in Australia) over at DBT Path. You might ask your psychiatrist or therapist if this might be a good fit for you right now.

    In kindness,
    Debbie

    Reply
  7. Anonymous
    Anonymous says:

    Hi Debbie! I appreciate your blogs. I have been with my boyfriend for 2 years and i am pretty positive that he is borderline… he has all the criterias and i struggle a lot… what can i do? do i approach him about it? he has so much anger inside of him

    Reply
  8. Anonymous
    Anonymous says:

    Hi Debbie! I appreciate your blogs. I have been with my boyfriend for 2 years and i am pretty positive that he is borderline… he has all the criterias and i struggle a lot… what can i do? do i approach him about it? he has so much anger inside of him

    Reply

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